Real Women of Gaming

Do you know there are about 2.8 million Deaf LGBT persons in the United States alone? Being a Deaf, bisexual, and cisgendered female myself, I wondered about the ways the Deaf/HoH (Hard of Hearing) community and the LGTBQIA+ community are similar. Each group has its own trials and tribulations individually but for those that are both Deaf or HoH and queer, things can be even more difficult.

In about approximately 90% of households, those who are within the LGBTQIA+ community are usually were/are raised in heterosexual parents just like Deaf/HoH growing up in hearing parents.

As a result they would often feel invisible, isolated, alone, and often oppressed in these households within their own families. Both have been traditionally forced to try to be “normal”. Deaf children end up being sent to speech pathologists, and even mainstream schools while queer people being sent to psychiatrists, or being ridiculed and bullied into being “straight”. 

Being Deaf and in the LGBTQIA+ community, it is considered a “double minority”. The Deaf community initially rejected people who were Deaf and also queer. Deaf people who were queer, in the past, were frightened that they would lose their support from social workers and the Deaf community so they would silence themselves to avoid additional troubles including prejudice, hostility and violence from the Deaf community. 

For themselves, Deaf queer people have been shown to accept their sexualities more easily, by more than 15% compared to their hearing counterparts. Deaf children, in theory, are more sheltered from the most virulent expressions of societal homophobia. Deaf queers find it less traumatic to accept being queer after already having experienced their life Deaf and the struggles that entails.

Like many parents of LGBTQIA+ youth, both hearing and Deaf/HoH, there is a general lack of knowledge when it comes to queer specific issues that their Deaf/HoH might experience like relationships and societal pressures. Parents of Deaf children can have additional challenges with communication that add to the difficulties.

Deaf queers are more likely to be victims of sexual, physical, and psychological abuse or assault. Deaf queers experience additional marginalization and exclusion, particularly with communication with HCPs (healthcare personnel), and poor access to key support, both formal and social. Additionally, there have been massive cuts to medical support teams specializing in Deaf needs everywhere, including social workers and mental health professionals. This leaves Deaf queer patients to not have the same range of services available to them that hearing patients can have available.

For instance, Deaf transgenders have reported they have experienced problems in being provided an interpreter for clinic appointments. They travel to centers of excellence and when they arrive, there is no Deaf interpreter to be provided. Deaf queer partners may find themselves excluded from their partner’s care because hearing hospitals don’t always book interpreters for them. Also, Deaf queer communities usually are small so patients and HCPs or therapists may know each other socially, causing issues of trust and concerns over confidentiality.

Deaf queers will need more mental health services to be provided to better accommodate them. In a civilized society, that shouldn’t be so hard to achieve. 

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As early as in the 1970s, Deaf queers have been a force in the gay liberation movement. Ann Silver, a Deaf Jewish dyke, was part of the development of lesbian feminism as a political identity and she was only the Deaf member of the influential radical dyke group called the Furies. 

On April 20, 1977 the Rainbow Deaf Society was formed to protect the rights and interests of Deaf gays. As told on their website, https://www.Deafrad.org/history, the society was envisioned by Roy Parker, a resident of St Lauderdale in Florida. “He wanted gays and lesbians from all over America to gather as new and old friends to become acquainted” and to establish an organization first known as National Rainbow Society of the Deaf (NRSD). This was later changed into Rainbow Alliance of the Deaf (RAD). Along with Roy Parker, the alliance was created by Dick Hill, Michael Hagerty, Guy Wonder(b. 1945 to d. 2020), Herbert “Herb” Fradin(b.1929-d.2010), Edward Schwartz, James (Jim) Dunne(b.1929-d.2016), and Richard Thrash.

Herb had become the first President, Mike; the Vice president, and Edward; the Secretary/Treasurer that year. There were originally 4 chapters led by 4 delegates: James (Jim) with Windy City Rainbow Society of the Deaf in Chicago, Ed with Empire Rainbow Alliance of the Deaf in New York City, Herb with Coconut City Society of the Deaf in Ft. Lauderdale and Mike with Sir II in Detroit. 

In 1991, it was decided that they had to change the word “convention” to “conference” to be eligible to receive grants and donations. Their purpose of this alliance is to establish and maintain a society of Deaf queers to encourage and promote the educational, economical and social welfare; to foster fellowship; to defend our rights; and advocate their interests as Deaf queer citizens concerning social justice; to build up an organization in which all worth members may participate in the discussion of practical problems and solutions related to their social welfare.

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Deaf Queer Resource Center was founded by Dragonsani “Drago” Renferia( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Drago_Renteria ), a Deaf queer trans activist in 1995. He is a Deaf Chicano, and long-time resident of San Francisco, CA. Drago was one of the first Deaf persons to publicly transition from female to male, paving way for others to unashamedly follow. In addition to many barriers Drago had broken as an individual, DQRC had made history many times. For one, the organization is behind National Deaf LGBTQ Awareness Week, which started in 2018.

Drago had spent over two decades fighting to provide much-needed resources to a group who is too often ignored. With DQRC, it had promoted positive visibility and empowered Deaf queers to take pride in their identities at a time when homophobia and transphobia were rampant. Drago’s presentations on transitioning and other transgender issues have helped hundreds of Deaf persons in their own transition process, as well as better understanding and acceptance of these issues by the general LGB and Deaf communities. DQRC continues to be at the forefront of the Deaf LGBTQIA+ movement. 

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Barbara “Kanny” Kannapell (b. 1937 – d. 2021) (https://gallaudet.edu/alumni-relations/barbara-marie-kannapell-an-appreciation/) was and still is one of the Deaf queer communities role models. She grew up in a Deaf household, and fought against audism for many years. She also graduated with three degrees (1961 with BA in Deaf education, 1970 with MA in educational technology, and 1985 with PhD in sociolinguistics). Kanny and her hearing spouse of 50+ years named Mary Eileen Paul, both white and a Black mother of a Deaf child, founded the Washington DC group called Deafpride (now defunct) to advocate the rights of Deaf people of all races.

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Uriel Torres (https://www.instagram.com/thelittlebearpedaler/?hl=en) , a Deaf Latix cyclist, raised over $35K with his team for the San Francisco AIDS foundation and the Los Angeles LGBT Center. At 10 years old, he learned of the HIV/AIDS epidemic that was at its height. Someone told him it was contracted through hugging, kissing, and contact with someone’s blood. Later, he was holding his baby sister and when a cut on his hand started bleeding, it accidentally came into contact with her mouth. He started to panic and went for help. Except he didn’t have anyone he could communicate with in ASL. Everything ended ok but that experience was traumatizing to say the least. While he fundraises and bikes for HIV/AIDS awareness, he also leads an effort to increase access to sign language. So no other child has to go through that same trauma.

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This is just a small sampling but there is more work to be done to help build out the history and movement of Deaf LGBTQIA+ people.

Happy Pride Month folks and remember WE LOVE YOU!