Guest Post by GooseWing -Wobbledogs: A Review!

by GooseWing

Wobbledogs is a pet simulator, where you breed bug-like dogs to make more bug-like dogs, and sometimes get unholy abominations that also look like bug-like dogs. You can feed your Wobbledogs many things, like a ham slider or a bulb of garlic, and unlock achievements and new flora that can give your creatures different mutations, such as longer legs, or an unholy amount of heads.

Exhibit A: This picture of one Wobbledog I made.

As you may see, this wonderful abomination has a gazillion wings, 10 heads, and so. Many. Legs. You can decorate the homes of your wobbly dogs however you like, and even make a torture room for the dogs who do bad! You can plant seed packets that your creatures dig up, or watch and help them make dens to sleep in. They poop, get stressed, play, attack each other, ignore you, die of starvation because they ignored you, and dance.

You can pet your Wobbledogs, watch them pupate, make LITERAL CEREAL BOXES, see all the bad decisions they make, scold them, and much, much more. You can play any way you’d like, name them anything, and best of all, breed them until you get the most glitchy dog ever. (See Exhibit A.)

Game Mechanics, AKA the important stuff.

Now that I’ve gotten past the fun stuff, it’s time to get into the nitty-gritty stuff, game mechanics. Now, there is the general stuff, like windowed, GUI, Pictures, e.t.c. Wobbledogs has one mechanic that I believe is important, and that’s Automatic mode. Auto Mode is a type of game play for people who are going to do something, but still like to play Wobbledogs. There are three things that Auto Mode does. 1, It collects capsules, dog eggs, and dog cores. 2, the dogs age, pupate, and die by themselves. 3, The breeding simulations run by themself. Now, I haven’t tried to play with Auto mode myself, but I’d imagine I should tell you about it. It’s not something I enjoy, but there is something else I enjoy, and that is the breeding simulation stability meter. 

This meter tells you how stable your wobbledogs will be, and as it goes down, the dogs get crazier and crazier, until 0%, where the game basically yells at you by distorting the music for the breeding simulation to the extreme. That is when you know to stop, since usually, the game just gives you a tiny litter with one dog. (From my experience at least. Sometimes you can get multiple two-three dog litters in a row, which is insanely lucky, so if you do, record it or something.)

Now, when entering the game, you can see three important things. One, an egg. This is how you can get into the breeding simulation. Two, a house. This is where your dogs will be stored. Three, three bars, one with a burger (hunger), one with three z’s (energy), and one with a tennis ball (happiness). Hunger is the one you have to pay the most attention to, because when it goes down to nothing, your dogs starve to death. You also have to pay attention to genetics. (I know, I don’t want to either, but this is important to your game not crashing.)

Now, if you look at Exhibit A, you may notice or infer that this dog will severely lag your game, and you are correct. This dog is super laggy, and I can’t keep them out for long. Never have more than one laggy dog out at a time. Also, don’t throw or shake your laggy dogs, that also can result in a blue screen. (your fps goes down significantly) I do suggest keeping a laggy dog in storage, because if they have good traits that you want, you may be able to breed out the laggy part.

Now, I’d like to talk about achievements. Achievements are how you get things like rooms and new dogs with new genes, or a gravity converter.. For example, the achievement, Gut Expert, gives you a dog that has six eyes, a gene that is almost impossible to get without that dog, or Out of This World, which gives you the aforementioned gravity converter, which is very helpful for flight training. Achievements are very important to progress in the game, but if you don’t want to work for your achievements, you can go on r/wobbledogs to find dog codes.

Dog codes are very fun, because without a picture, and just a description, you can get some hilariously random dogs, for example, Exhibit A. I got it from a dog code, as it is…very hard to get that many limbs/appendages. Sometimes dog codes are adults, and sometimes they are pups. Definitely check if the poster of the dog code says what the age is. (This is very important, as sometimes people give you ancient dogs that are about to die, or were playing on a game with an extended lifetime for their dogs.)

So, these are the ups and downs of Wobbledogs, the best parts and the worst parts. It’s a very cursed game that’s also quite a bit of fun. It’s great to play in the background or to stream, and there’s lots of freedom in playstyle. So try it, and see how you like it! I hope that you do!