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I’m Harley Quinn and You Can Be Too

I’m Harley Quinn and You Can Be Too

I’ve loved Harley Quinn since she first popped up in my Batman cartoons as the insane goof who simply wanted to be loved. She had so much appeal for me and I couldn’t figure out why at first. I loved how open she was about her crazy, about her desires, wishes, wants. She was so open about who she was.


tumblr_nrg1h4YcRD1r5rk9to1_540Goddess forbid you piss her off. She was scary all by herself, but you didn’t know because she was almost always with the Joker. She was never her full self because of him. In Suicide Squad (BTW, I love you, Margot Robbie!), she dreamed of what she really wanted out of life: her family.  I clung to her more and more as I grew older because I realized that I wanted to be her; we were similar. Well, except for the murdering and the crime spree. It was touch and go with me for awhile, though.

While she was a therapist, I wanted to be a lawyer. Odd thing when you’re a teenager. I was told I wasn’t smart enough and those words stuck with me forever. Now, I have to convince myself that I’m not an idiot. I’m plenty smart enough and I would have made an amazing lawyer. That produced a negative spiral that I spent a long part of my life just accepting.

I’d find myself with significant others that I would adapt to; never being myself, being a version of me I thought they would want. In essence, I was putting them all in the Joker’s role. Some of them are great people who I’m still friends with; some of them were abusive. Some knew about my past and some where just contributing to it. That is all in the past now, but it still matters. I became more like the Harley I saw in the shows. (I am in NO WAY saying that the cartoon made me this way, so shut the fuck up. Yeah, you about to make a comment, go away. It’s a comparison, relax.)

Of course, Harleen was driven insane after making a poor choice in significant others (I’m mean, we’ve all been there). Putting someone down creates its own insanity. It magnifies depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts. It’s not the outward crazy that you see from Harley, but my mind feels like her so often. My thoughts, feelings and decisions all feel like they are swirling in this tornado of insane that would make me burst into fits of laughter because I had no tools to properly handle this.

acaf814305641c00772a4e97f56c63ebSo that was the person I grew into, until I met my husband Vel, my Poison Ivy. I met the person who told me it was okay to be me and he didn’t want me to be anyone else. So I waved good bye to my past, my very own Joker, and I took time and figured out who I was. Turns out, I’m still Harley Quinn. I’m still an obnoxiously loud, crazy, weird nerd. I’m getting more comfortable with showing people who I am.

(SIDE NOTE: I am not some Disney movie telling you that you need a significant other to make it all better, so fucking far from it. It’s just a weird anomaly that it worked out this way for me. Don’t go looking for someone to ‘fix you’ because he didn’t ‘fix me’ he allowed me to fix myself without the pressure of being ‘his ideal version of me.’ He created a safe space that I couldn’t find on my own. A support system is good, but that can also be found in the form of friends, family and trained professionals.)

I’m embracing the, ‘fuck you if you don’t like me, I’m awesome’ mentality. Holy shit is that hard to do. It’s hard to just rip off the masks you wear and say, ‘THIS IS WHO I AM!’ I’m trying and it’s terrifying, but also freeing. I’ll get there. I know it.

I have two points to this:

1) Harley Quinn evolved as a person. Fictional characters can do that. If a fictional character can do it, so can you.

2) Embrace who you are. It’s so exhausting being someone else and I promise there is no one out there like you. You are unique, special and wonderful. Let everyone see who you really are. Let them fall in love with that you.

I know you’re probably screaming, ‘IT ISN’T THAT EASY!’ No, no it isn’t. It’s taken me 10 years and I still have so much work to do, but you can get started. I promise, we will be right here waiting for you when you come out of your cocoon and spread those amazing wings and proudly say, ‘HERE I AM, BITCHES!’ We will clap for you and hug you and embrace you for who you are.

Until next time, stay vigilant.



Injustice – Gods Among Us

Harley1200So, I finished the storyline for Injustice. I don’t think I will actually ever finish the whole game. I’ll give it a shot, but I’m not that awesome at fighting games.

Actually, I don’t like fighting games usually. I find the women scantily clad, the best moves to be impossible for me to get off and after a couple of fights I’m just plain bored with it. It’s the same thing over and over and over again.

Now, with all that being said, I haven’t been able to put Injustice down. Harley Quinn is my favorite character in the DC universe by far, hands down. If you met me, you’d get it. I really don’t agree with her outfit, however. Yes, she is sexy as hell, but really? It would simply make much more sense if it were closed in the front; then I’d actually be on board. It feels like a cheap attempt to see her panties. Every other character’s outfit seems pretty on point to how they normally look. Harley seemed to be the only one getting a major makeover. Now, her second outfit I find much more fitting for her personality.

Ok, so end that rant. Now, let’s talk about game play. Everything is beautiful. I love the scenery, the characters, the interactive background. It all made the game just as awesome as the characters themselves. I did keep pointing at the screen asking what the hell was going on in the background. I’ve never seen a more magical fighting game. It was hard to pay attention to actually fighting sometimes because I was too enthralled with trying to catch all of the details in the background. Not to mention constantly trying to interact with things, like hitting my opponent with a rocket. THEN! I would get knocked out of the scene, into someplace new. I loved it when this happened, however I didn’t love the fact that no matter how hard I tried, I was never the one doing this, so it was always my character falling down some cliff and being badly injured for it. Totally worth it.

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